A ton of bands invade Oslo’s Medieval park for the Øya Festival over 5 long days, and someone’s gotta listen to all the artists to see what’s good. You’re certainly not doing it… God forbid. You’ve paid 2000 kroner or more to be seen, get laid and drink….and maybe hear some music while standing in the beerline. Maybe you are foreign press dreaming of rolling in the hay with a budeia/farmhand and party for free until you drop on the fjord; or maybe you’re traveling from abroad to enjoy an “exotic” festival expense, ah I mean experience.
Bad Sounds have made a list of a few of the many shows you can check out while stumbling through the festival crowds. Also included; a list of shows to avoid that will definitely bum your high, plus a few general tips to keep you alive and sane through the week.
Remember the “festival pass” doesn’t pay for entry to all the shows listed below. One of the highest-priced summer festivals wasn’t expensive enough, so the club shows will cost extra. The Øyapass only giving about a 15-25% discount on those tickets. Still, it might just be worth the cash this year.
Bands to see:
Tremoro Tarantura – biggest local surprise this year. Good and heavy live show.
Barren Womb – non oslo hardcore/punk/screamo
Cold Mailman – Pretty nice indie pop/rock from Bodø transplants.
Okkultokrati – One of Oslo’s best live bands
Laura Mvula – Soul from Birmingham
Wu Tang Clan – “So, when you see me on the real, formin like Voltron / Remember I got deep like a baby seal!” Nuff said.
Public Service Broadcasting – British instrumental rock
Kraftwerk – Remember to bring your 3D glasses that you used for Glee: The 3D Concert Movie.
Goat – Heavy “world music” from Sweden
Jagwa Music – get your tribal dancing shoes on.
Unknown Mortal Orchestra – 60’s inspired psychedelic pop done well
The Knife – interesting to see what kind of live show we get this time around…
Haraball – old school punk, opening for Slayer (stick around for Slayer too…obviously)
Dirty Beaches – dirty dirty filthy beaches
Kill City Bandits – 80’s Mötley Crüe posers
Anything Norwegian “hardcore” hip hop: Southcentral LAs got nothing on Tøyen.
(Go see the selection of positive and/or American hip hop instead)
Dromedar – worst band in Oslo.
Supermale – superlame, but with mustaches!
Black Debbath – silly and pointless.
Kvelertak – Radio friendly “hardcore” for the masses
Of Monsters and Men – utter shiiiite. Soulless Arcade Fire copy without songwriting ability.
Ice Age – Don’t believe the hype. Really, don’t.
Honningbarna – BRRRÆÆÆHHGUUABBBEERRAAAÆÆÆ!! or, at least that’s what the vocals sound like.
Blood Command – generic hot topic/ mall punk.
There are about 150 bands to choose from, so don’t take our word for it (although we are aaaalways right)
…to bring cash, and lots of it. (Ask your mom for your allowance early this week.)
…to wear a tank top so you can show off your faded Fred Durst tattoo.
…your hipster t-shirt, neon sunglasses, your hipster scarf or your colorful rubber boots perfect for summer weather.
…to bring protection. Catch some good music this week, not chlamydia.
…forget earplugs (40 is a little early to learn sign language)
…forget to drink water (it’s free to drink out of the provided cow troughs)
…forget to smile; you’re on camera. (possibly also in the bathroom)
Lastly, don’t forget to have fun!
Pace yourself, it’s a long exciting and tiresome week.