We are all about fashion here at Bad Sounds….well not really. We couldn’t give a fuck, but we still are baffled and irritated by certain gnomes we see on the street of our fair city. There have been many strange rocks fashions throughout the years (and I’m not talking about Lady Gagas meat suit) but rock fan fashion. Norway has taken it to a whole other level. Here then is a (mostly) rock oriented guide to Bad Sounds “fashion faux pas”. We at Bad Sounds have probably been guilty of one or more of these at some point, but we’re not all perfect. (we’re just really really close)
Woolen scarves inside – You’re at a show where it’s 100 degrees inside, but you still wear a woolen scarf. What gives? I can see people wearing a thin silk scarf as an accessory, but a woolen one seems stupid and really warm. Keep em’ outside and during the proper season!
Woolen hats indoors – This has been a very swedish indie rock thing for some years, which makes you look like a goof, especially when worn with a thin mustache, giving it that swell indie rock sailor look. It’s totally ok to be bald or maybe a little thin in the hair; it can happen to us all; but there is no point in having a stinking sweaty woolen ferret on your head indoors. For some reason it doesn’t matter what season it is, they still wear it. Maybe switch up the material?
Rubber boots – during the summer. Rubber boots have become a fashion thing around here. Not particularly comfortable or with real foot support, people still wear them around in the streets. Keep it to when it actually rains, the woods and to festivals please.
Red jeans – If you are from the west side of Oslo or own a boat, we get that red jeans is “hip”, but for the rest of us you look ridiculous; especially combined with a pink shirt or a freakin vest.
Giant wristwatches – Yes we can see that you have money. No need to have a 2 ton piece of metal on your arm to prove it.
Yellow tag on your winter jacket – This one is fucking bizarre. People pay 100’s of dollars to have a yellow strap on their winter jacket which looks like a ripcord from a parachute. WTF?
Sleeve tattoos – Everyone has tattoos these days, which is fine; but do you really feel the need to cover all that beautiful skin with some shitty soon to be faded snake? We’re talking to you ladies, your skin is nice as it is.
New York Yankees cap – No self respecting baseball fan wears a NYY cap unless you are from New York City. 99% of the people that wear them in Europe don’t even know who Derek Jeter is. If you’re gonna wear a New York hat, go for The Mets. Wearing a NYY hat on your head is like walking around in a Chelsea F.C. hat, and no one needs to see that, especially from someone who wears it for fashion reasons. Plenty of other baseball team caps to choose from – maybe not wear a cap from a team that buys championships?
You don’t care? That’s fine, but expect to at least fake some knowledge when you’re stopped by a fan. (A baseball reference on Bad Sounds…bet you didn’t see that coming.)
Workout spandex – Yes we know you take care of your body, like totally every day and stuff. It’s now cool to wear those even though you are not working out that day. Maybe switch to some better looking spandex? It can be a nice look, just not with the shitty lines or text on them.
Woolen flannel shirts – No you’re not a logger from the 1800’s and no you’re not from Portland (or Brooklyn) We are all about “earth colors”, but there’s no need to over do it. In combination with a giant beard it just looks silly.
Rock T-shirts – Yes we love them and buy them at shows. It is the only place we buy clothes when we run out of clean ones. We love discussing obscure bands with the one person in the room who might know the band. It makes us feel special. Ramones t-shirt bought at the mall doesn’t cut it though.
All black – It’s all emo, all the time; and everyone needs to know; especially when your sleeve tattoo isn’t showing. (not to be confused with the metal uniform where it’s a normal look)
Rock buttons – So you want to support your favorite bands with a button. That’s cool, but at some point you start looking like a reject from Office Space. No need for 37 pieces of flair.
Hoodies from H&M – Yep they are awesome and cheap. Everyone should own 2. You can easily hide your face when tagging the town. Everyone can look a little punk rock in a hoodie even if you work for an oil company by day.
Did you learn something? No? Well then go out and be the best you you can be. Wear what you want and enjoy life. We will secretly make fun of you though.